We discussed that upon my return to Canada I could ‘jump ship’ with her assistance so we could marry and run off into our own world. We were young and certainly dreaming in the carefree style of youth but we felt it was something much more.
We spoke about other little things, a few more questions about each other but it was clear, our main topic of conversation remained my return and our wanting to be together for always.
We did not dance this evening. We didn’t want to shift in any way from our fixed position there at the table. I cannot describe too well exactly how it was and the only thing which comes to mind is this: it was like someone brought a heater over to our table, placed it there at our feet, making us so warm and cozy leaving nothing to exist outside our immediate parameter.
I was so confident this was completely beyond a simple flight of fancy. We were melting over here, into one another! Unfortunately for us, the clock continued ticking the seconds away and not only did she have to get home I too had to return to the ship.
Not once during the evening did we separate. There would be the occasional glance over to the table her sisters occupied and always a friendly smile or wave was sent back our way. I knew we had their approval.
It was about 10p and we had to admit it was time to say goodnight. We both slowly stood up knowing that would begin the separation process. We immediately embraced. Funny how the departing embrace felt too short and not at all like the eternity of meeting again. We held on to each other as long as we could and then I kissed her on the cheek.
She looked at me with that special smile of hers and right away she kissed me. She kissed me! Well then, I knew this was certainly meant to be. Now I returned the kiss and wow, we were glued together in what brought back that feeling of eternity!
I don’t know how that moment spirited away but we found ourselves, with her roses in one hand and my hand in her other, at the table of her sisters and I knew I had to leave.
I said goodnight and thanked the girls for being so kind. “Good night lovely ladies, it’s been my pleasure.” They replied with smiles and giggles, “We’ll see you soon!”
Sonia stood beside me and it was very clear to me, she did not want to be separated from me, nor I from her. We were holding hands all this time and as I had to make a move towards the door, we held each other’s hand right up to the last touch of fingertips as they slowly fell away from the dream.
As I walked out the door I looked back and saw that Sonia was silently watching me. Although there was a subtle smile on her lips, I sensed sadness in her eyes. My heart felt hers. We hesitantly waved to one another and I was out the door. My heart remained in her hands.
I grabbed a cab and returned to the ship. Now in my cabin, I changed into my pajamas, turned down my bed and sat on it. I felt the need to say a prayer. I asked God to help me return to Sonia, never letting us part again.
Also I asked Him to keep her healthy and happy …and then I saw her beautiful smile and so much love in her gentle brownish-blue eyes; well I guess my prayer trailed off at that point and I lay down, methodically pulling the covers over myself, to assure you the only thing I had in my mind was returning to Sonia.
I tried desperately to sleep but most of the night I was kept awake with images of her holding on to me. They were so intense I could feel her body holding mine so tight as though she knew I would leave and …I knew Sonia never wanted me to leave. In my heart, I did not want to leave her.
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